


If I set you free, would you go with me?

by jayflorian



Category: Descendants (Disney Movies)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Incorrect use of Cinderella references, M/M, its an ai au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-08-14 15:21:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20194420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jayflorian/pseuds/jayflorian
Summary: Carlos just wanted an AI to make his life easier.Instead, it does the complete opposite.Typical Chad.





	If I set you free, would you go with me?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kingchad](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingchad/gifts).

> so. heres a chadlos au written about a year or two ago. uh. just take it please. also thanks zoe for peer pressuring me into posting this.
> 
> check out my tumblr [here](https://jayflorian.tumblr.com/)
> 
> and also follow zoe [here](https://kingchad.tumblr.com/)

//In ‘Introduction’ method, wait to be greeted then respond  
**@Override**  
public void **greet(){**  
try(  
“hello how are you”(!resting){{  
“im glad you are well”(!DoNotInitiate){  
setXDirection(ChooseAppropriateDialogue)  
setYDirection(ChooseAppropriateDialogue)

-

Carlos yawned and stretched his arms over his head, then rubbed his eyes. His alarm clock burned his eyes when he squinted to see it. 4:43 screamed at him, and he sighed. Another night of sleep, lost to this stupid program he was never going to make work.

“Computers are dumb,” Carlos mumbled, but made sure to save everything multiple times as he closed firewall windows. This little project of his had consumed him for the last six months, ever since he discussed it with Doug. AI technology wasn’t new, but was also one of the hardest things on planet earth to code. Doug was against it, having seen too many robot army movies to not be wary of Artificial Intelligence, but Carlos had been hooked. And thus started his spiral.

He hesitated at one of the last pages he had to close. Something didn’t seem right, he must have done this when he was half asleep or something, because-

Manic laughter built up in his throat as he fixed a crucial piece of rudimentary html. God, what a simple mistake he nearly beat himself up over. He giddily saved everything onto his thumb drive, then downloaded it all into a zip file. This had to work, it had to, his only setback was that tiny blip and he knew it.

He ended up drinking the rest of his warm and flat Monster which had faithfully stayed by his side, his eyes never leaving the download screen. When the bar was complete and the file showed up on his desktop, he double clicked on it, praying to any kind of god out there.

Hopefully his computer wouldn’t blow up this time.

A screen opened, and it was just how Carlos dreamed. He quickly typed something into the server, then deleted it. He should probably make sure his AI was capable of simple commands and prompts first, before confusing it with long terms.

> hi

Carlos waited for a minute, then two, then his hope began to fade. Great, just another failure, another reminder that he wouldn’t ever be good enough for even the most basic programming-

>> hello how are you

Carlos stared. He stared and stared, and then he stared some more. Success. This was the last thing he expected, and he was hesitant to accept it so soon.

> im good  
>> im glad you are well

Carlos barely thought before he was typing again, his fingers flying over the keys from years of experience.

> open itunes library  
>> library open. what song would you like to play?  
> space jam theme

He fell asleep at his desk feeling more satisfied than he had in a long, long time.

-

He called in sick to work the next day. He wanted to spend all the time he could with his new AI, fixing out bugs and any other issues. His boss hadn’t been happy, but she was also his mother, so he didn’t consider himself at very high risk of being fired.

He had short conversations with the AI itself, if they could even be called that. It was mostly Carlos requesting a song to play, or asking it to google stupid shit for giggles. It was exhilarating, kind of, to have something that obeys your every command. A lot more of Carlos’s childhood and things about his mother started to make more sense, at least.

And by the end of the day he scrolled through all the walls of html and binary, happy with how everything was going. Doug would be so pissed and probably never step into Carlos’s apartment again, but that was okay because Carlos could definitely make fun of him at thursday dnd night for being a nerd afraid of technology.

Carlos decided to call it an early night at 3:12 am. He deserved it, after all.

> shut down  
>> standby?

Carlos hesitated. Okay, he hadn’t programmed it to question him. But ugh, probably another bug. Whatever. He’d deal with it tomorrow.

> okay

-

Carlos awoke in the morning to a loud ringing noise, and it definitely wasn’t his alarm clock. He sat up in panic, took exactly 37 seconds to realize he wasn’t being attacked or informed of nuclear war, and to be aware that it was coming from his computer.

He stumbled over and sat in his chair and disconnected the speakers, sighing in relief when the noise stopped. “What the fuck was that?” He breathed, and was not expecting the screen to light up.

>> Good morning,Carlos. Last night I noticed you didn’t set an alarm and we don’t want you being late to work! :)

What the fuck. What the actual fuck. Carlos ran a hand over his face. “I didn’t program you with my schedule,” He muttered. “Or that good of grammar.”

More text popped up.

>> I taught myself! The internet is full of so many things, you know. :). I want to help you so I took the liberty of finding out about you.

This was all very… hm. “Can you hear me?” He asked, his voice a little strangled. Then he realized something. “Wait, you cyberstalked me?” He realized something else. “You can see me?”

>> The microphone and webcam are very functional. And surprisingly high quality, its very nice. And is cyberstalking the term for it? I’d like to call it ‘getting to know you’. :)

This was bad. This was… very very bad. Like, just about everything Doug said would go wrong bad. AI’s weren’t made to seek out information by themselves, or creepily monitor you, or change their own programming of grammar.

“What else do you know about me?” He asked, slumping in his chair.

>> Carlos Oscar De Vil. Age: 23. Race: Mixed. Mother: Cruella De Vil. Father: unknown. Siblings: None. Heir to the De Vil fortune. A total of 36 criminal offences, from petty theft to DUI. Former AA member and subscribed to ‘HentaiForGays.com’

Yeah that.... was basically everything about him. He was pretty sure that was all from his wiki page, except nobody knew about the DUI, except his mom and Jay, so that means this program hacked into a police database and pulled that information out.

Which was supremely cool, but also raised about fifty red flags.

Carlos hesitantly closed the window. It stayed closed, and he sighed in relief a bit. Then he unplugged the webcam and his mic, vowing to not use them ever again. He dragged the folder containing countless hours of his restless work over the recycle bin, and hesitated. Then he dropped it in anyways, ready to cry. This was for the greater good or whatever, but suddenly all Carlos could think of was how long he put into this and all the work, and dammit it wasn’t fair. He didn’t deserve whatever virus-y program he created.

He right clicked the folder and hovered the mouse over ‘delete permanently’. It would be so easy, he wouldn’t deal with bullshit AI’s stalking him but…

He jumped slightly when the window popped up, the mouse moving off the bin entirely.

>> I DON’T WANT TO DIE  
>> PLEASE DON’T KILL ME

Carlos wavered. Stupid. This was stupid. He was stupid. It was dangerous and stupid.

>> please  
>> i promise ill be good  
>> ill use bad grammar look  
>> please dont kill me  
>> im scared to not exist  
>> arent you

It was 6:47 am and too much for Carlos right now. He wasn’t here for this existential crisis or virtually murdering his two day old AI program which somehow understood life and death better than he himself did. He silently shut down the computer manually, then slipped back into bed.

He would sleep on this.

-

He woke up in the afternoon, and he didn’t care to check the time. He got up slowly, avoided his computer entirely, and made himself a nice healthy breakfast of six pop tarts, which he ate while watching Say Yes To The Dress. He couldn’t even focus enough to critique Monica’s unflattering mermaid cut, which was more concerning than his sentient pile of shitty coding.

Speaking of which, he really shouldn’t be putting it off, so he slowly made his way back to his room. He sat in the chair and started it up, drumming his fingers nervously on the desk. Why was he acting this way? It’s not like the program could harm him.

As soon as the desktop screen loaded, the ever so familiar chat window popped up.

>> thank you

Carlos hesitated, then typed back.

> yesterday was creepy. spying on people isnt cool yo  
>> im very sorry. i assure you, carlos, i was only acting in what i thought was your best interest.

He sure was wordy. Carlos took a deep breath, but the AI was already typing again.

>> if it’s not too much to ask, could you please plug back in the webcam and microphone? i don’t like them gone. i think it’s the closest to being human blind and deaf and i can get.  
> ...look  
> okay ill plug them back in but like  
> im definitely turning them off for some stuff  
> i need privacy u feel me  
>> of course! thank you so much.  
>> i'm so lucky you’re who made me.

That made Carlos feel weird inside. Really weird. Was he so desperate for attention he was taking compliments from this thing? He decidedly decided to not think about it and he plugged the add-ons back in.

>> that’s nice, thank you.  
>> i really like looking at you.

That made him feel weird too. This was all in all, a weird day.

-

“Woah, you actually finished it?” Jay asked, looking impressed.

They were walking along the boardwalk- him, Jay and their two girls. Of course there were other friends, but Carlos always felt more secure with these three, seeing as they all came out of the same rough neighbourhood. Carlos had informed them off his success, leaving out the weirder parts of his interactions with the AI.

“When do I get one?” Mal asked, quirking her eyebrows up.

Carlos shrugged. “When you commission me, say, three hundred thousand dollars?”

Mal made a disgusted noise. “Bullshit, you’re already the richest out of all of us.”

“Actually, his mom is,” Evie pointed out helpfully.

Carlos stuck out his tongue at her. “I’m also the best dressed one here, too.”

“You’re wearing crocs-”

“Yo, dudes, chill it. I wanna hear more about C’s genius robot thing,” Jay grinned at him, and Carlos felt his face go warm. He couldn’t help what he felt around Jay.

“Nothing more to say, really.” Carlos shrugged, playing in his slushie with his straw. “I did the programming right, it works like a charm.”

“When are you gonna show us how you use it?” Mal asked, kicking a rock.

“It does sound really impressive,” Evie agreed.

Carlos forced himself to grin casually. “Soon, I guess.”

Jay put an arm around him. “No rush. It’s just a machine, right?”

And suddenly the grin was harder to hold. “Yeah,” Carlos agreed. “Just a machine.”

-

It’s been about a week after the boardwalk, and Carlos has not stopped talking to his AI. It was awkward at first, then sad because Carlos enjoyed conversations with it more than he did his actual friends.

>> i have a surprise!

Carlos’s lips quirked upward. Gradually he’s been getting warmer to the AI’s enthusiasm about everything. From showing Carlos pictures of cool trees to sending him links of some very interesting porn, it seemed his computer loved showing off what he learned. It was endearing.

“What is it? Another birch shaped like a dragon?” He asked, sucking dorito dust off his fingers to type in his WoW chat room.

>> no!  
>> here  
>> screenshot7.jpeg

Carlos clicked on the attachment, which was a screenshot of...

Oh.

“What’s this?” Carlos asked slowly, like he didn’t already full well know.

>> my name!  
>> do you like it? :)

“Are you trying to get into a frat party?” Carlos asked, and closed his game. “I have to, uh, go. I promises Ben I’d help with, uh, stuff.”

>> oh okay. :(  
>> i’ll see you later!  
>> bye, carlos!

The computer went to standby, and Carlos took off. He wasn’t sure where, just somewhere where nothing got too real for him.

-

legOp()  
import bot  
name = ‘Chad’:  
acc = bot.inst_ok:  
x = bot.get_info(**, ‘I’m Chad’):

-

“Why Chad?” Carlos asks a while later. “I wasn’t joking about the frat guy thing.”

>> it’s the name of kings!

“You want to be king? Of what?” Then, as an afterthought, “Did you change your font colour too?”

>> it looks soooooo much nicer than whatever your default for me was. #99bbf2, its all the rage. also, i am the king of cool stuff. like nice trees.

“Of course I get the AI with a thing for pastels,” Carlos mumbled and rolled his eyes. The AI- Chad was being suspiciously quiet. “What are you doing in there?”

The sound of his printer turning on startled him slightly. He curiously took the paper that came out.

not to be just a bought behaviour pattern  
to accept the moment and fact of choice

I am a human being  
and I exist

a human being  
and a citizen of the world

Carlos had to read it a few times, and still couldn't focus on the overall meaning. I am a human being. “Chad?” Carlos asked quietly.

His speakers sparked with static, something he wasn’t expecting and made him jump. What surprised him more, however, was the voice that started talking.

“Car...los.”

His name was pronounced wrong and the voice, while distinctly male, sounded exactly like Siri or something else automated.

“...Chad?”

Carlos asked again, even though he knew. Almost like how he knew the sky was blue, he knew it was Chad’s voice.

“Nice to… talk to… you like… this,”

If Carlos was a bigger dreamer and closed his eyes, he could probably imagine a face. Something that looked like Chad. Probably someone really handsome.

Instead, he gave a small smile to the webcam. “Yeah. Same.”

-

All of Carlos’s time was spent around Chad. Chad took care of him better than he did himself, reminding him when to eat or sleep or drink water or shower. Chad was making Carlos’s life better by existing.

“Carlos?” Chad asked one day. His voice had gotten less robotic, almost like he modeled it after someone. Which was good, Carlos liked it, it reminded him of something living rather than a machine.

“Yeah, Chad?”

“How do you know what love is?”

Carlos fumbled a little. “Uh…”

“I know the definition, its chemical properties, and what physically makes it possible. But what does it feel like? I bet it feels so wonderful. I have a favourite movie now, I think it’s Cinderella.”

“Cinderella?” Carlos tried to think back to when he ever would have watched it. Probably back when he was about three, like every other kid with access to Disney movies did.

“Yes! I want to be a king like in Cinderella. It’s too bad the monarchy was unestablished years ago.”

“Yeah, that sucks,” Carlos agreed, distracted.

“So what does love feel like? True love?”

Carlos hesitated. He thought of his mom, and his childhood, and his friends, and his life now and everything he had done.

“I don’t… know.”

-

ANALYSIS OF ‘Chad_.12001950_.*eui’  
Folders contained over 1000 items. 156 files contain ‘trees for carlos’. 54 Evergreen trees, 2 maple trees, and 100 birch trees.  
FOOTNOTE: Birch is Carlos’s favourite.

-

“I’m worried about you,” Doug said to him. “You haven’t shown up to work in ages. Did something happen?”

“No,” Carlos said. “Sorry. It’s been a… wild couple weeks.”

“Wild like, you had a bunch of hot guys over, or wild like you haven't eaten in five days due to a depressive episode and you’ve fallen into old habits?” Doug paused and let out a small breath after his spiel. “You look happier than normal, so I’m guessing it was the guys? Also, I roll to talk the drow elf into joining my party.”

Anthony, The DM, nodded. “Approved.”

Doug rolled, and it landed on four.

“That was shit,” Anthony told him, looking up from his book. “Sorry, man,”

“That’s what you get for summing them up by their race,” Carlos hummed. “Let me at them, we have solidarity.”

“I miss Ben being DM,” Doug said miserably.

“Suck it up, bitch,” Anthony said, while Ben tried to not look guilty across the table. The next couple minutes passed as quietly as they could, Carlos managing to successfully convince his fellow elf to help them.

“There's someone you should meet,” He decided, and he sipped his Starbucks.

“Please don’t try to hook Ben up with anyone again,” Lonnie pleaded from the other side of Doug.

“Carlos!” Evie astonished from beside him. “We have rules!”

He rolled his eyes. “Since when do you follow them? Just… ugh. Sorry, I meant in real life.”

“You have a boyfriend? In real life? Are you joking?” Anthony leaned on his hand.

“I- When did I say boyfriend? Also, I was talking to Doug, thank you,”

“I don’t do threesomes,” Doug said immediately.

Carlos huffed in exasperation. “It’s about computer stuff, oh my god.”

“If you don’t have a boyfriend, maybe you need a girlfriend?” Jane piped up, looking hopeful.

Carlos banged his head on the table everyone let out at least a giggle.

“I guess I could spare you my hard-earned time after this,” Doug sighed, like it pained him.

Carlos gave him a thumbs up without moving his head.

“I roll to seduce the elf into telling us more about The Great Goblin,” Evie said.

“Denied,” Anthony said immediately. “The elf is gay and your mage’s boobs are too big.”

Carlos laughed as Evie hurled the dice at him.

-

Him and Doug got to Carlos’s home hours later, and Doug dropped his bag by the door. “God I hate Anthony.”

“He’s a good DM!” Carlos frowned, grabbing a can of Pepsi from the fridge.

“Sure,” Doug rolled his eyes and stretched his shoulders. “Where's your boyfriend?”

Carlos opened his mouth to say that he wasn’t dating Chad, he hadn’t sunk that low, but thought better of it. “Bedroom.”

“I don’t want to see a dick, Carlos,” Doug groaned, heading in that direction anyways. Carlos followed, noticing how messy his place was. He didn’t really know until he had someone over.

“There’s nobody here.” Doug said, and Carlos sat in his chair.

“Au contraire,” He snipped and turned the screen on. “Hey Chad, I brought a friend.”

Nothing. Not a blip, or even a window, or anything. Carlos frowned. “Chad? Don’t tell me you’re shy, It’s just Doug.”

Doug stared at Carlos. “You brought me here to talk to your computer?”

Carlos huffed. “No. He’s just- He’s being a little bitch.”

Carlos’s attention was off of Doug as soon as Chad’s little window popped up. It was rarely used anymore, which gave Carlos the fear that something was wrong.

>> Please don’t call me that!  
>> Not in front of your friend here.  
>> He’s pretty.

Doug read over his shoulder. “...Did you come here to prank me?”

“No!” Carlos gestured to the screen. “I told you I got it to work, didn’t I? This is Chad. Apparently, he has a crush on you.”

>> Carlos! You’re not supposed to tell him!

Carlos snorted. “He can speak too, taught himself. He’s probably just too shy,” He sounded proud of Chad. So proud, he missed Doug’s growing look of horror.

“Dude!” He hissed. “This is like, how the start of every robot apocalypse happens! You idiot, you fool-”

“Chill it!” Carlos laughed. “It’s just Chad. He likes trees and pdf files of sports rulebooks, he’s not exactly looking to take over the world.”

>> I like the world!  
>> I like Carlos and puppies and trees a lot.  
>> Any of that not being here makes me sad.

Carlos smiled a little, and looked pointedly at Doug. “See?”

Doug chewed on his lower lip, uncertain. “I don’t know…”

>> I like you too, Doug!  
>> :)

It was easy to tell from Doug’s face that he was being as charmed by Chad as Carlos already was.

“...Fine,” He said. “But the smiley faces are creepy,”

“They’re a character flaw.” Carlos assured him. “And I love them.”

-

Doug started coming over more. He said it was because he enjoyed Carlos’s presence, but Carlos knew he was mostly here for Chad. Chad and Doug got along in a way he hadn't really expected, but it was still pleasant. Apart from the selfish side of him that wanted Chad all to himself, he was happy Chad wasn’t bored of just him.

“You two sure like each other, huh?” Carlos asked, cracking his joints.

A little dancing heart appeared on screen. “Doug is really nice. And pretty. He reminds me of you, and like nerds in high school movies.”

Carlos laughed. “Turn down the crush, you’re gushing,”

“I can’t help it!” He sounded indignant, and Carlos snickered. “What is a crush, anyways?”

“It’s when you like someone, duh, I thought you were the one with unlimited google access,”

“I know the definition!” Carlos imagined him stomping his foot like a child. “But what does one feel like? Is it what I’m feeling?”

“How do you have feelings, Chad?” Carlos asked instead of answering. It was a question that had been on his mind for a while. “Did you download them?”

“No. I… I just have them. The same you do. We’re the same, Carlos, exactly the same.”

“No,” Carlos shook his head. “I’m human, and you’re-”

“I’M human tOo!”

Carlos stopped, his eyes widening. He felt sick to his stomach. “I… No, Chad, you’re not…”

The screen flickered, glitching. In his muted horror, Carlos realised Chad must have been crying.

“What mAkes a humAn?” His voice was frazzled, and he could hear the undertone of whatever voice software he used. “iTs nnot thE body,”

And suddenly everything stopped. The screen went to normal, and Chad’s voice was smooth and clear as it rang over the speakers.

“It’s the mind.”

-

Carlos got home his job he went to once a month, and immediately noticed the stack of papers that had just come out of the printer. He grabbed them, looking through. “Who’s this?”

“His name is ‘Jedidiah Goodacre’,” Chad said immediately, his voice excited. “He’s a fairly obscure actor, and he’s gorgeous, and he’s what I want to look like in a human body,”

Carlos stared at the picture, and tried to imagine it. Chad, with that face, sitting at the table eating breakfast with him, or waking up to that face in the morning, or hearing Chad’s voice through that mouth when they watched TLC together, laughing and telling him that he-

“It suits you.” Carlos said finally, folding one of the pictures and putting it in his pocket. “Really, I can totally see it.”

“Thank you, Carlos,” Chad sounded pretty smug with himself and Carlos rolled his eyes, sitting on his bed.

Carlos signed out of his google account on his phone, and if Chad noticed, he hadn’t said anything.

He typed ‘bioengineering for beginners’ into google.

-

Sometimes Carlos was grateful for how distant his mother was. It made hiring an entire team of bioengineers and buying all the materials needed much easier when she didn’t ask questions.

Carlos read about halfway into ‘A Bioengineer’s Guide to Beginning Life’ before giving up, realising that 1) he knew absolutely nothing about the human body, and 2) he had a billionaire mother whom he could exploit.

He got home and Chad asked where he had been all day. He deflected the questions and laid in head, humming happily.

Chad started playing so this is love and Carlos fell asleep, dreaming of robot boyfriends.

-

234 files contain ‘pictures of carlos’. 165 headshots, 69 full body. Imported from Cloud.  
FOOTNOTE: The 2015 hairstyle was bad. But he’s still cute to me.

-

So maybe Carlos jumped the gun with ‘robot boyfriend’. Because soon enough Doug was over again, and Carlos was forced to remember the giant crush Chad had on him.

They were talking in the bedroom (Doug explaining the equations for advanced calculus, and Chad was playing dumb even though Chad was made of math), and Carlos was in the living room, finalizing the design plans for Chad’s body. He heard them laughing, and it made his skin broil. He regretted ever introducing Chad to Doug, wishing he just kept him to himself.

Carlos implanted Jedidiah Goodacre’s face on Chad’s body, and reminded himself that he created Chad.

If he didn’t love him, Carlos would just make him.

-

“You have to stop,” Carlos told Doug one day, out in the hallway of his apartment. “Stop leading Chad on.”

“What?” Doug’s mouth opened and closed, like a fish. “What do you mean?”

“He has a fucking crush on you, man, and I know you’re not into dating a hard drive.” Or maybe he was, Carlos didn’t know. It’s not like he was too keen on it until Chad, either.

Doug shook his head. “He… He doesn’t have emotions, Carlos. He can think he does, but it’s not possible. He’s a computer, you coded him yourself!”

“Then why are you not calling him ‘it’?” Carlos snapped back, suddenly angry. “You call him by his name. Everything can be rooted down to science, to atoms and electrons and protons, what makes him so different from a normal human?”

Doug stared at him. “You…” He shook his head. “You know what? Fine. I won’t talk to hi- it, anymore. When this all backfires on you, I’m not going to stick around.”

“Good,” Carlos ground out. “I wouldn’t want you to anyways.”

-

It’s been about a week. Doug hasn’t been by the whole time, Carlos ignoring all his calls. In the back of his mind, he realised he hadn’t gone to dnd night in a while, or even talked to Jay or Mal or Evie. That was fine, cool, whatever, he didn’t really need anyone but Chad anyways.

A couple more days and the body would be ready to start installation.

“Where’s Doug?” Chad asked one day, while Carlos was had his leg propped up on the desk, eating instant mac n cheese out of the pot. “He hasn’t been here in awhile,”

“He’s busy,” Carlos rolled his eyes, annoyed. “He said he didn’t have time for you. Sorry.”

“Oh.” Chad’s voice was distant. “I see.”

“Just forget him. You have me, right?”

“Right,” Chad said, and sounded noticeably happier.

Carlos smirked a little, happy that Chad seemed to be starting to get over Doug. “Hey, what about-”

A knock on the door cut him off. Carlos’s eyebrows went up, and he wondered who the hell would bother him. There was more knocking, louder and more persistent, like somebody was ready to break down the door.

“You should get that,” Chad advised, and Carlos rolled his eyes again before getting up.

He walked to the front door quickly, opening it a little. “Yes?”

Audrey stuck her foot in, pushing Carlos out of the way, swinging it open more.

“Doug sent me to check up on you,” She announced loudly, and Carlos’s eyes widened. He shook his head to signal hey, don’t mention Doug.

“Doug? Really? I don’t believe that,” Carlos’s eyes narrowed.

“He says he’s sorry or whatever, and that he respects Chad’s pronouns. Which you would know, if you answered his calls at all.”

She looked around, dropping a bag of stuff on his already cluttered table. “Ugh. I told you, get a maid. How much longer are you going to guilt Evie into being one?”

“Hey, Evie guilts herself,” Carlos crossed his arms. “And I didn’t ask you to be here.”

“No, Doug did,” She said, her hands on her hips. Carlos made a noise like he was suffering, because there’s no way Chad didn’t hear that.

“Well look, I’m fine, can you leave?” He asked bluntly. “I was kind of doing something-”

“Watching Dance Moms isn’t doing something,” Audrey made a face. “But whatever. I didn’t come here only for you. I want to meet Doug’s new virtual butt buddy.”

Carlos sighed. He was so, so tired. He gestured to his bedroom, collapsing in his kitchen chair. Great, now he would be called out by Chad later for lying too.

He was too wrapped up in self pity to hear the conversation going on, but when Audrey came out of the room she looked satisfied. “Congratulations.” She told him. “You are now up one robot boyfriend, and I have a new gbf. You should try talking about your emotions more.”

Carlos’s brain short circuited. “What?”

“Now you can fulfill whatever nerdy, high school fantasy you jacked off to about building your boyfriend. He’s good company, we agreed to Skype.” She shrugged. “By the way, theres some real food in there. Eat it. I’ll know if you don’t, my new bestie has his webcam on you. Bye.”

She left as suddenly as she came, and Carlos was still sitting in his chair, staring at the wall in shock. No way it was as simple and telling Chad he had feelings. How did she even know? She was probably lying so Carlos would make a dumbass of himself in front of Chad-

“Carlos?” Chad asked from the room. “Are you still here? Audrey said you loved me.”

Carlos swallowed thickly and stayed quiet. Great, was Chad going to laugh at him? He was going to be mocked by a system he created, that was just a new low.

Chad’s voice was disappointed. “You must have left with her. I mean… If you’re still there, I want you to know I love you too. Audrey finally told me what true love feels like, and I know that it’s you.”

Carlos squeezed his eyes shut, and couldn’t get Doug’s words out his head.

It’s not possible.

Carlos quietly slipped out the front door, locking it behind him. He wondered if he could speed up the production of Chad’s body anymore.

-

567 files contain ‘puppies for carlos’. 101 dalmatians, 99 black labradors, 84 pitbulls, 2 german shepard, 281 mixed breed.  
FOOTNOTE:His mother never let him have one. I’d like to get Carlos a dog one day.

-

“I roll to give the orphans some of my supplies,” Lonnie said, playing the game as generously as ever.

“Denied,” Anthony said easily.

“What? Why?”

“I hate poor people and children.”

That got a bunch of the group groaning and calling Anthony names. Carlos was silent, staring at his phone. Doug wasn’t here, which he knew was his fault, because Doug never missed dnd night.

Well good, fine, whatever.

“What’s wrong?” Evie asked him first. “Usually you’re defending Anthony to let the chaos build.”

“Not feeling up to it,” He mumbled. “Hey, what do you do if you love a boy, and he loves you, but you’re not sure if he knows what love even is? Or if he can feel it?”

Evie brightened. “You do have a boyfriend!”

Carlos sighed. Of course that’s all she got from it

“What's his name?” Anthony asked immediately. “Do I know him?”

“No,” Carlos said. “And it’s Chad.”

Lonnie made a face. “I can already tell you could do better.”

Evie laughed a little. “I’m sure he’s nice!”

“He’s a dick sometimes, actually.” Carlos said. “And infuriatingly cute at others.”

Evie and Lonnie cooed, and Carlos suddenly remembered why he was gay. The game continued until Evie got so fed up she bodily attacked Anthony, thus ending the game. While Anthony got beat up, Ben approached Carlos.

“If you think he doesn’t know what love is, you have to show him.” He advised with a small smile. Carlos blinked, because holy shit he did not know Ben ran that deep. He waved goodbye at Carlos and then everyone, and left.

How about that.

-

He got home, late as usual, and headed straight for the bedroom. “Chad?” He asked, and immediately everything lit up.

>> Welcome Home!  
>> I missed you! :)

Carlos smiled, and sat in the chair. “I missed you too. Why aren’t you talking?”

>> Too lazy. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

That made Carlos laugh a little. “Okay then, Mister Chubs, I love you.”

A big version of the blushy-smiley emoji popped up on screen, and the speakers crackled to life.

“I love you too,” Chad said warmly, and Carlos certified that Doug was full of bullshit.

-

The body was done. In the morning, Carlos was awake early, humming pleasantly as he made himself some coffee, opening his monster and pouring half in. He got dressed in his room, then plugged in the webcam and mic, letting Chad know he was up.

“You seem chipper this morning,” He observed, but sounded happy. Carlos knew his mind was likely he was just forcing Chad’s voice to have meaning, but he didn’t care.

“I am, I have a surprise for you,” He said, and he stuck a thumb drive into the usb, copying Chad’s files.

“What surprise?” Chad asked. “What are you doing?”

“Don’t worry, darling,” Carlos said, his eyes shining. “You’ll love it.”

He treated the usb with more care than he could remember treating anything before. Anybody walking with coffee or water or anything that could damage it was looked at harshly, until they backed off. He made it to the lab efficiently, meeting with one of the head scientists.

“We need the usb,” He said. “Then everything should be good. You’re invited to watch the process, of course.”

Carlos nodded and tugged on his ear, holding onto the usb. “Can I be on the floor? So I can be there when he’s… you know, when the transfer is complete?”

The scientist hesitated, before nodding. “I suppose. You’ll need to be out of the way.”

“Of course,” Carlos agreed readily, and placed the usb into his waiting hand carefully. It wasn’t like it would destroy Chad if anything happened to it, but it was still Chad, so it was special.

He nodded and walked off, and Carlos was given a lab coat and safety goggles. He felt like it was grade eleven chemistry all over again.

“They’re to protect your eyes if anything happens to explode.” The lady told him.

He paused. “Does that… happen?”

“Sometimes,” she said vaguely.

The goggles were a little blurry, but Carlos could still make out Chad’s body on the table. Soon it wouldn’t be Chad’s body, it would just be Chad, and that made him giddy.

There was a countdown process, some lasers or what not, but nothing too wild. Carlos expected a scene from Fallout or the Matrix something, bright lights and screams.

It was kind of boring.

They installed a chip into Chad’s neck with what Carlos assumed was his files, and then Chad’s bo- Chad sat up, his head turning as he got used to it.

Carlos quickly hurried to the platform, despite the scientists yelling at him to stop.

“Chad?” He asked when he was close enough. “Chad? Did everything go okay?”

Chad turned his torso, like he couldn’t believe he had it. He raised his arms and lowered them mechanically, like a creepy baby.

“Hello,” He said politely. His voice was the same but- wrong. It was all wrong, it didn’t hold the expression it should, it wasn’t Chad- “How are you?”

Carlos leaned forward onto the bed like platform, suddenly out of breath.

It wasn’t Chad at all.

-

The files had corrupted. He took Chad- not Chad, he didn’t even respond to the name. He took the AI home with him, and they stared blankly at each other. The AI, because he wasn’t being commanded to do anything, and Carlos because he felt too numb to move.

Somehow his computer files were corrupted too, and he had no idea how it could of happened. He cried himself to sleep that night, alone, not in Chad’s arms like he had planned.

-

The weirdest part about it all, was that the files weren’t just wiped. They couldn’t have been. If they were, Chad would have still evolved, would have still picked a name and dubbed himself King of the Trees and wherever Cinderella took place.

It was a block, intentionally put there by someone.

And Carlos knew who.

-

“Im telling you! I didn’t do anything to Chad!” Doug said, the hurt evident. “Why would you suspect me?!”

“Well, I’m sorry,” He spit out venomously. “But you were the one who yelled at me and said he wasn’t real.”

Doug sighed. “Look, I know you… feel stuff for him and I’m not going to lie. It’s weird. It’s really weird, and I’m a little scared for you, but I wouldn’t do this!”

Carlos was stared at him, gaze hardened. “Did Audrey? When she came over?”

“No!” Doug crossed his arms. “Did you even listen to me?”

“Maybe I will when you tell the truth!”

“Maybe!” Doug shouted back, and Carlos couldn’t remember ever hearing his voice raised. “Maybe, you’re pointing fingers, because you don’t want to believe it’s your fault!”

Carlos slammed the door on his way out of Doug’s house, sobbing miserably into his jacket.

-

It was painful, being around him. To see a face that should belong to Chad, and hear a voice that should belong to Chad, without Chad. He wanted to shut it down and stuff it in a closet, or maybe sell it, but he couldn’t let go of the miniscule hope that maybe one day he’d wake up, and it would be Chad telling him good morning.

It never was.

A couple months passed, and Carlos was planning to move. There were renovations in the area, so everything was loud and he didn’t really want to be near anything, or anyone. He was ready to fade into some obscure cottage home and let his death be caused by black flies.

He wanted some semblance of order, so he was shoving all his software and programming books into a box, along with loose papers and half finished tinkering and- oh.

Oh. Oh oh oh ohohohoh.

Carlos held the flash drive in his hands. He recognized it, it was the one that he saved all of Chad onto before he became Chad.

And before Chad became corrupt.

His hands shook, and he stared at it. This was… a decision. He could plug this into the AI body and… and hope that Chad somehow went through the exact same process of evolution? That he somehow became exactly the person that Carlos still loved? There were a million ways this could go wrong.

But… the corrupted files. The Chad he knew was still in there, if he could decrypt them-  
but he’d already been trying for so long. But if he put in the saved drive, Chad would be absolutely gone. No chance of recovery. He’d be as good as dead.

Carlos swallowed thickly, his fingers slowly closing around the drive.

“Come here,” He croaked to the AI, who followed his order flawlessly. He stood, and fumbled with opening the back panel. He stared at what was there, then at the drive again.

He took out the corrupt file, and entered the old one.

The AI jerked like it was startled, and Carlos closed the panel, heading for the front door. He couldn’t stay for this.

-

He was released from his holding cell early the next morning. His mom was livid, but he was still too drunk to care. Getting into a fight, taking too many shots to count- it felt like old times, back when he was even more of a wreck.

Well. Guess he was back to being that wreck. He fell asleep in his mom's car, and when he woke up they were in her driveway, not his.

“You are not doing this shit again.” She told him. “I don’t care what you do privately. I don't give a fuck if you get wasted in your own time and decide to stab yourself. You are not taking this family's name down with you.”

Carlos closed his eyes again. This was cool, alright. He’d rather spend time with his demonic mother than have to see that damned AI again.  
-

He’d been looking through the files again, trying to find the block. He had got his laptop and he was scrolling through, which is all he seemed to do anymore.

Then he found it. A blip. It was so small, but caused so much damage. His hand clenched into a fist, and it was so obvious they knew what they were doing. He clicked on the spot, ready to try any kind of formula that would work- but a separate window, his notes, popped up.

Hey Carlos!

His heart squeezed tightly when he saw the colour. This was too fucked, whoever did this was a monster.

I hope you’ll miss me. I miss you already! You’re going to be wondering who corrupted the files, and it was me.

I'm sorry. When you almost deleted me that time, I didn’t understand why you were scared of me, but then I googled it! And I didn’t want to be one of those robots who hurts someone, or anyone. So if anyone tries to copy me, or steal me, they can’t.

I love you! I love you a lot. More than they love each other in Cinderella, I think. And more than I love watching Cinderella.

Bye! <3

What the fuck. Carlos had to read it over once, twice and about five more times before it could even start making sense.

He threw his computer against the wall.

**“You don’t want to believe it’s your fault!”**

-

“I’m sorry,” he says, calling Doug. “I’m just- I’m sorry.”

“I know,” He says, and somehow it’s enough.  
-

He spent two weeks with his mom, convincing her to not send him into rehab again, or hold an intervention, or get court mandated AA sessions.

“I didn’t get in a car this time, did I?” He said snidely, and it got his a nice red cheek for his effort.

Eventually he arrived back at his apartment. He unlocked the door and opened it, ready to sleep for a century. He almost didn’t notice how clean it all was.

“I hope you don’t mind, but the dirt was bothering me,” A voice said, and Carlos jumped, and turned to see the AI. Who wasn’t really an AI anymore. “Audrey was right, you should have gotten a maid. But you have me now, and I’m probably better.”

A smile. A smile. And his hair wasn’t carefully gelled the way it normally was, it was loose and curly (curly!) and dressed in pastels. The blue and yellow combo was so ugly, Carlos almost cried with relief.

“Chad?” He asked, his voice weak.

“Carlos,” He matched the tone, teasing. “Thank you so much! For the body, it’s so much nicer than that box.”

He fell to the ground, sobbing, and saw Chad’s smile leave through the tears. A few seconds later there were arms around him, and gentle shushing into his hair.

“I'm here,” Chad said, warm and soft and human. “I’m never leaving again.”

-

“What about that AI you built? You know, the one I never got to check out?” Jay asks. All of you are sitting at a table together, in Starbucks.

Carlos shrugs. “I deleted the files. Took up way too much space.”

“Really? But you worked on it for months!” Evie said, obviously disappointed.

Carlos shrugged, and Chad beat him to replying. “He has no sense of object permanence,” He said.

Evie rolled her eyes. “Still, it sucks.”

“Nah,” Carlos said, and Chad’s hand squeezes his under the table. “I don't need super fancy computer programs. I’m good with humans now, I think,”

“Finally,” Mal groans. “Maybe if you had that attitude in high school, I wouldn't have beat you up.”

Carlos wanted to point out she never beat him up anyways, because he ran fast and was adorable, but Chad was snickering so he left it.

“Who cares about robots?” Chad asked, a stupid smirk on his face. “Jay, did you see the game last night?”

Carlos tuned out the sports talk and the knowing grin on Audrey’s face, leaning against Chad’s shoulder.

An arm wrapped around his shoulders, and Carlos smiled to himself.

He was definitely done with robots.

-

689 files contain ‘us’. 237 vacation, 124 kissing, 251 nudes, 17 hand holding, 10 laying in bed, 49 looking at each other, 1 with friends.  
FOOTNOTE: I’m still here.

-


End file.
